The Shrinking Sea Kitten………

English: Annual mean sea surface dissolved oxy...

English: Annual mean sea surface dissolved oxygen from the World Ocean Atlas 2005. Dissolved oxygen here is in mmol O 2 m -3 . It is plotted here using a Mollweide projection (using MATLAB and the M_Map package). (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Scientists from a Canadian university say  that by 2050 there will be smaller fish in the oceans and fewer of them.

Warming of the sea will lead to less oxygen in the water and therefore fish won’t be able to grow, shrinking in size by anything up to a quarter.   Fish will migrate from warmer water to the relatively oxygen rich areas near the poles This will have dire effects upon the food chain in the ocean as well as the world’s fisheries and the availability of protein for human consumption. (Trust humans to think of their own stomachs first!)

The pending disaster is of course worsened by the overfishing that already occurs and the thoughtless proliferation  of humanity.

However The End is not yet upon us as I can suggest solutions…

Firstly Homo Sapiens must stop breeding at such an appalling rate.    Fewer people would place less strain upon the fish supply and if people could train themselves to breathe less oxygen they too would grow less and therefore need less food thus saving a few fish.  Do you follow my impeccable logic?

Secondly, everyone should start fish-farming.  TV should exhort the nation to breed tilapia  in ponds in  each and every vegetable garden and commercial fish farms should increase in size ten or twentyfold.       On reflection the tilapia  idea is a bad one.    Their flesh is grey and they taste of mud.     Far better to encourage industry so we have swarms of delectable edibles like these:

Food Glorious Food

I think I’ll have to find a way of persuading the Fusspot and the Duvet Denier to invest in a salmon farm.    After all, their survival, not to mention mine, could depend upon it.


Does Equality Breed Stupidity…….

I’ve spent all day puzzling over this and have decided to share it in the hope that someone out there might have an answer.

As I was snoozing circa 4.00am today I overheard a BBC programme called (I think) “Have Your Say“.   For an hour or so people were phoning in from all around the world to broadcast their opinions on a topic which was so badly discussed that I’ve forgotten what it was.     I’m sure that no conclusion was reached before I fell asleep again.

It seems that the BBC thinks it  a Good Thing that everyone has the chance to air their opinions as though all opinions were of equal value and all opinors/opiners worthy of air time.   i can only suppose that by providing this service the BBC consider that they are being truly democratic and supporting the  supremacy of the  doctrine of Equality.

Well I have news for the BBC.   Not all opinions are created equal.    Some are of far greater value than others whilst some are so wretchedly feeble, ill thought through and badly expressed, that like superfluous dogs they should be strangled at birth.     This morning people talked past each other and I suspect were often  so busy thinking what they were going to say next that they failed to hear or understand what others had already said.

I resented being woken by the programme.   Too much of it  was utter tosh and a complete waste of time.

If the BBC cared about the needs of serious minded creatures they would rebroadcast  all 100 episodes of ‘The History of the World in One Hundred Objects’  so we could hear the ones we missed last time and the whole world could be educated at the same time.

Lost Cats and Their Foibles…………..

Having little better to do on a wet afternoon I’ve been paws to keyboard trying to solve the mystery of the whereabouts of Mr Ginger Tom.

Believe it or not, cyberspace is littered with lost ginger cats: Alvin from Bradford; Fudge from County Armagh and a host of others from Brighton, Suffolk and also Catford.     There was even a ginga called Poldi who finally found his way back to his home in Germany after 15 years.    The Fritzcat was identified by the tatoo on his ear but I have my suspicions about Alvin and Fudge et al.   Any one of them could be the elusive Mr Ginger Tom.

Persians on the other hand are more selective in their wanderings.     Apart that is from Poppy who went missing in Sheffield and whose slaves offered a L500 sterling reward for her return.     Alas, Poppy showed a deplorable lack of style in that  she was found hiding down a coal shute.    Shamefully unPersianlike and I think she needs a lengthy course of  counselling.

Here is a  Persian who showed better taste.     Sabrina, as the rescue staff named her was found beneath a house in Porirua, a low income area near my city.    Although flea infested,  scrawny  and in need of hours of pampering she remained fussy about her food and would only accept Fancy Feast, not the usual rescue centre basic rations   I hope they realised that being a Persian she was also entitled to regular smoked salmon in her diet.

Though a rather unlovely mess in her de-flead and shaven state she will be glorious when her coat grows again.

Never Trust A Dog…………

The Fusspot and the Chair Stealer/Duvet Denier were woken last night by a howling southerly so to drown out rattling windows they listened to the BBC which performed a public service by broadcasting a health warning for all dog owners.

a basset hound

Be very  careful if your dog of choice is one of these.

It seems that somewhere in France a Monsieur Rene Quelquechose went hunting with his dogs but lost the use of a hand when one of them shot him with his own gun.     Freaky.

All things considered it is safer to have a killer cat as a household companion.    Nowhere have I ever seen a story about a cat seriously injuring its slave.

Wills, Kate and Those Photos……….

I think it’s time the royals took a reality check.

These people live a privileged life travelling the world doing and seeing interesting things (usually at someone else’s expense) and then expect to be allowed the privacy of Mr and Mrs Nobody.     They are naive if they don’t know that the only place Kate can sunbathe topless secure from prying papparazi is in the extensive grounds of Balmoral Castle.

To expect a long lensed gutter-mag photographer, who is only trying to earn his bread and butter, to be sensitive, tasteful and not to snap is about as silly as expecting a dog not to scratch its fleas or a cat not to express its catness by hunting and killing.

All creatures are different and should be free to be themselves……..Dogs excepted – they should be exterminated.